Perhaps
by citigirl13
Summary: They weren't meant to be.  Let's just say that here and now.  Damon and Elena weren't meant to be.  Oneshot.


**Hey! **

**I haven't seen any episodes since 3x10 (just came to back to the UK last night! Aaaahh! Loved it!) so I'm not sure what exactly happened in episode 3x14. But I think I've got the gist of it. If I'm wrong, well, can we just pretend for the sake of the story? ;-) **

**Anyway, hope you like it! **

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of the characters; this is simply for entertainment purposes only.**

**xXx**

**Perhaps**

They're not meant to be. Let him just say that here and now: Damon and Elena aren't meant to be together. They aren't that happy run-off-into-the-sunset couple. As much as he hates the cliché of it all, he wouldn't be horrified at the idea. He finds himself day dreaming of finding a house together, living in a small town, jetting off to month long vacations in Paris, New York, Thailand. Smiling, laughing, dancing. He images it all, hands twining in each others.

It's getting harder to remember that image when he hears those words out of her mouth: _"Maybe that's the problem." _

Sitting on the sofa, a cool glass of scotch against his head, he's trying to remember Elena. The girl he first met now over a year ago: innocent, thoughtful, able to laugh. That girl in the kitchen who thought the worst thing in the world was to lose her parents. It's difficult now. All he sees is the girl who is able to stab an Original – and herself; the girl who is escorted by both him and Stefan; and the girl who tells him "to get over it" after she's basically snubbed him after he's voiced those words, those three words with eight little letters.

All he sees now is Katherine.

The thought hits him suddenly, like a rock to the head; like cold water being thrown over his body.

She's not Elena anymore. She's just another version of Katherine.

**xXx **

Stefan comes through the door, and before he even hears or sees anything, he can feel the change. It's like the air is humming after a witch has used a huge, energy draining spell. The younger Salvatore stops in the foyer. Despite this new, bad boy attitude, he is almost scared to continue inside. Something big has happened. Something's changed.

Slowly he walks upstairs. He can hear now, and the noise scares him.

He arrives at Damon's door. Previously he's never been allowed in Damon's room. Yes, it's so childish and third grade, but after a million attempts Stefan stopped trying. The door to his brother's room has remained closed – that is, until today.

It's wide open and easy for Stefan to look inside. He watches as his brother throwing things in a bag. Well, books. That's all he can see Damon packing, that is, until a flash a light green distracts him. He blinks, surprised. He hasn't seen Elena's journal in a while. Of course it's over a year old now, and she's probably on a new one by now – that is if she's still writing one. Maybe that's what Damon's counting on, hoping she won't notice it missing. Stefan watches as his brother holds onto it for a moment too long before slipping it into his case. He doesn't wonder why Damon would want to keep it. Surely it's obvious.

"What are you doing?" Stefan asks. His voice seems tighter than usual, and he has to force the words out.

Damon doesn't even turn round. "Packing," he answers shortly.

"Why?"

When his brother turns round, Stefan can tell something's not right on his face. He's smiling, but it doesn't reach his eyes and for once the sadness on his face would be obvious to everyone in the room. "I know you weren't lucky to inherit my brains Stef, but surely you understand what's going on."

The attempt of human falls flat on his face. "What's going on Damon?" He takes a step forward into the bedroom he was never allowed in.

His brother sags a little; that's the only way his can describe it. Shoulders down he doesn't bother to hide the seriousness from his face. "I'm leaving."

"Where are you going?"

Damon lifts a shoulder.

Accepting this – because Stefan knows that this isn't the worst thing, not yet – he says, "When will you be back?"

Damon lifts his gaze to meet his brother's. "I'm not," he says softly.

Time seems to freeze. Suddenly the room is too small and despite the fact Stefan is a vampire he is struggling to breathe. He doesn't get it. His mind can't understand this. This is _Damon _for God's sake. "But-" He takes a deep breath, trying to stop his voice from catching, because really, he doesn't want to be like that; doesn't want to act like the little brother that really needs his big brother, even if at times he knows a little less than Stefan does. "You can't leave."

Damon slowly turns back round, zipping up his bag. "Maybe I can't," he admits. He lifts the bag on his shoulder. "I guess we'll see if I make it."

"What about Klaus?" Stefan demands. "What about destroying him and the Originals?" He doesn't step forward but backwards, so he is standing right in the doorway. "You've got a score to settle, brother. By leaving you're letting them win."

Damon is quiet for a moment. His face is calm like the ocean on a sunny day. Stefan can't figure out why it's strange, until he realises it's because he hasn't seen that look on his brother's face in a long time. Maybe even before they turned. "It's not my battle Stefan, and you know it. It's yours. I'm not the centre of this." For a while that had bugged him: how it was once again _always Stefan_. But now he's grateful for it. He can get out.

And he isn't just talking about the Originals.

"I need your help," Stefan says. He crosses his arms, trying not to show how desperate he is. "Like you said, no one can be devious like you can."

Damon lets out a little chuckle. "Actually, I think you're giving me a run for my money."

At his last ditch attempt, Stefan asks, "What about Elena?"

He sees his brother's face freeze, and instantly knows he's hit the target. He watches as fleeting emotions appear on Damon's face before it settles again. "She's got you."

"I'm not reliable," says Stefan, a little too quickly.

"You are," Damon replies. When he smiles it's filled with fragile glass ready to shatter. "You're trying to fight it Stef, but you love Elena, and you'll protect her, even when you're like this."

Stefan can't argue with him. He knows its right. Damon knows that Stefan can't leave Elena. He's too far gone.

Damon's not. Not yet. This is why he's leaving now, while he still can. Another week, another day, another hour, and he may not be strong enough.

He goes to the door and gently moves his brother out the way. "I'll see you around, Stef," he says. And because it's too serious, he adds, "I'll send you a postcard. Don't open it in public though, I may send you a few pictures of what – or rather _who _– I'm doing."

He is in the hallway when he hears Stefan's voice. "Damon?"

When he turns round his brother is facing him, but he's looking anywhere but him. "Please don't go."

When Damon looks at his brother, he feels a whirl of emotions run through him. He's not angry at him, not anymore. He sees Stefan when he was three, learning to walk; smiling when he caught a fish for the first time; leaning against an armchair talking to Charles Dickens. And he sees other images too, future one: running through the snow with a dark haired girl, both of them laughing and shrieking. Damon can't tell whether it's Elena or not; hell, he can't even tell if it's real. Maybe it's just what he wants.

He's letting go of everything. He's losing things he loves, but he's also losing the anger, the hate – _finally _– that he's been holding onto for so long.

In a sudden fit of love, he pulls his little brother into a hug. He can feel his brother's surprise before he relaxes, just for a moment. "Be good Stef," he whispers (the only words he can), before turning round and disappearing out the door. He doesn't look back, not even in the rear view mirror as he drives away. He knows that if he does, he won't have the strength to go through with it.

**xXx **

When Elena enters the bedroom, he's by the window. "Damon?" she asks. Her voice is a little stiff – still not forgiven for sleeping with Rebekah, of course. "What's wrong?"

He stares out the window. If he looks at her right now, he might lose his will. "Nothing," he says carefully. He watches a family a four playing in their garden. The little boy is throwing a ball at his sister, who is screeching at him; the parents are attempting to have a normal conversation. Amazing that, somehow, they manage to lead a normal life.

He feels Elena set something down before asking, "What are you doing here?"

Perfect opening: it's now or never. Slowly he turns, because really, he can't not look her in the eye. Her hair is tied back in a ponytail and she's wearing a red top. She always looks good in red. "To say goodbye."

She stands very still. "What?"

He's gone too far to turn back now, so he steps forward slightly. "I'm leaving Elena."

Her eyes widen in disbelief. "Why?" she asks quickly. "What is it?"

How can he explain it to her? He's leaving because for the first time he's not seeing her as Elena, but Katherine. And he can't be in love with Katherine, not again. He's not strong enough.

Damon looks away, his eyes going round her room. He's memorising it, knowing that he won't see it again. Or at least, that's what he plans. He's not even certain he can leave yet, but he's made it this far. "I can't stay here anymore Elena," he murmurs.

Elena goes towards him, hands on his body. "Is it me?" she asks. Her eyes are filled with pain and remorse. Maybe now she feels bad. Maybe now she's sorry. "Damon, I'm sorry about what I said to you at the ball. It was stupid, I didn't mean it-"

"You did Elena." His mask, his attempt at being calm that he's kept up so well is finally starting to crack. "You meant what you said. And I'm sorry, but it still pisses me off, because even though I have been here with you all the fucking time it's still Stefan-"

She pulls away then, on the defensive. "I'm sorry, alright?" she says, not sounding apologetic at all. "I'm sorry I didn't pay enough attention to you. But God Damon its Stefan. He's part of me. I didn't have anything until he came back."

He looks at her, his blue eyes burning cold fire. "You had me."

It strikes her then, like lightning. Hearing the words that he's said, the exact words that she said to Stefan finally make her understand his pain: the ache and hurt of knowing that while you were standing there, waiting, they didn't give a damn about you. They didn't think of you being worthy enough for them. They didn't consider you, full stop. She feels the pain again, the pain that she felt when she said those words, and finally, _finally_, she feels his pain too.

She cries. Tears run down her face as she begins to sob, and Damon takes her in his arms. He can't help it; taking care of Elena seems to be innate for him. He holds her as she sobs and forces himself not to do the same.

Maybe she thinks that she's convinced him. Maybe she's doesn't. But when she calms down and he gently disentangles himself from her, she seems surprised. "I have to go."

Her eyes flash, and Damon doesn't know whether it's from fear or anger. Maybe both. "What about Klaus? Are you just going to leave me to deal with him?"

"Stefan will protect you."

Elena's face shows what she thinks of _that _plan. "I can't trust Stefan."

_Yes you can. _No matter what, Stefan will always look out for Elena. He's willing to give up his life for her, and practically has. They'll work it out, Stefan and Elena. They'll be that sweet couple that hold hands and that everyone smiles at and predicts when they'll get married.

Some couples are meant to survive. Some aren't.

"You'll be fine," he assures her. He's not sure how much an enemy Klaus will continue to be. He's seen how he looks at Caroline. Hell, he's worn that look a thousand times.

Her face crumbles again, like a dark cloud threatening rain. "Damon, please," she begs.

He stares at her, this beautiful girl. He has been obsessed with this face for over a century; when he finally let go of one version, he ended up falling for the other. If it wasn't so tragic he would laugh. Someone he always seems to go for the wrong girl; he always believes that this girl will cause him to have his fairytale ending.

Perhaps it was never about either of them. Or perhaps it was about the both of them. Perhaps the reason for Katherine was to bring him into this time where he could meet his soul mate; perhaps Elena was meant to help him heal so that when he _did _meet his soul mate he would be able to let her in.

Perhaps his soul mate, the one who would actually love him back, was just around the corner.

Perhaps this wasn't even the end. Perhaps a week later he would return, as if he'd never been away.

Still, even as he thinks this, he can't help himself. He pulls Elena into his grasp and kisses her. She is surprised, but like Stefan she relaxes. Her hands grab his, but he forces them back down. If she's confused, she doesn't show it. In truth, she can't care. This kiss, like every kiss she has gotten from Damon, causes her to fly; to feel like her whole body is burning up. Eyes closed she can see herself, standing in the garden, on fire and not even caring. When he pulls away she keeps her eyes closed, wanting to hold onto to that image of her burning.

When she opens her eyes, Damon – the man that is possibly the only person on the planet that is like her; the man that could have made her beyond happy – is gone.

That is the last memory that she has of him. Even in her darkest hour, when she is sitting on her bed hugging her knees to her chest, sobbing, she can't help but think that it's a pretty impressive last memory.

**xXx**

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